I switched Churches at 16 because a friend of mine told me that a pretty girl played drums for their new gospel band.
I was simultaneously boosting my Church attendance in order to satisfy a moral conscious, as well as getting some eye candy while we were supposed to be closing our eyes to pray. I have, thankfully, developed a deeper understanding of love in the framework of spirituality, and my journey as a gay woman since this point.
Love is patient. What did that mean in the context of a lesbian who was being unwillingly dragged out of the closet because of the rumours that spread like crazy around the small inner-city Church?
Having to be patient, and having to accept the patience of others is at the core of spiritual community. Love is often kind, but occasionally, ‘Love’ can feel like a sharp whack to the shin with a blunt axe. So, the notion of patience for our community is learning that not every person who holds a bible in one hand, holds a stone in the other.
As much as I was given opportunities to learn patience, it was also extended to me in ways I could have never imagined. As is the experience of many of us who find ourselves in the beautiful and wretched position of possessing an often forbidden way of loving.
Patience from others is realised when people refused to follow their peers in order to learn from our experience, even though they might not quite understand.
Patience was handed to me when I spotted that pretty drummer girl at a gay night, and she shared her own story with me about her journey coming out as a gay woman in an often hostile environment.
Love is Patient.