4Men - Gay Relationships

Intimate and sometimes explicit advice and tips on the gay relationship and bedroom scene

Knees back? Legs up?

By Alex James

Switching positions mid-process adds spice to your sex life, but if you're not in a sex-tech mood it can feel disruptive, in the absence of a good choreographer.

Still, finding that same old position and staying there hours (optimistically thinking) can get dull. The answer? A third way for the third sex. With a few variations built on the initial topology, seamless continuity is readily achieved without the need to start planning supper.

Let's illustrate a typical session, based on the bottom-on-back, top-facing-bottom's-face, foreplay assumed as understood, classic opening gambit. We'll call the bottom 'B' and the top 'T'. Two players. T and B to win.

B lies back, head resting on one or more pillows, so he doesn't have to strain to see T or to stroke himself. He lies a little way down from the headboard, assuming there is a bed, so that later, when the pillows are whisked away, he can lie back flat without the need for awkward repositioning reminiscent of an 8 legged creature trying to crawl.

It's T to move. B helps him by holding his own knees close to his chest while T slips on a condom and lubricates himself and B. T enters, only a little at first, then with slow and increasingly firm thrusts achieves full penetration.

They pause. Each side accustoms himself to his various sensations. T might choose to tease B a little, prolonging the wait, such that B has to coax him. Then he moves, suggesting initial, potential rhythms, alternating long, slow strokes with hard, full-length thrusts. T remains in a kneeling position. The sensations for each are building but not yet completely overwhelming. The reptile brain stirs, though the higher brain functions remain - both in control and as spectator.

T then hooks his arms beneath B's knees (well, it is) and lowers his face to touch noses, smiles, holds it a moment, and kisses B. There is contact and reassurance, re-associating for each partner the physical sensations of sex with their love for each other. B replies by cupping his hands behind T's head to encourage the kiss to linger and become more passionate, then lightly strums along the ticklish sides of T's torso to incite him further.

T begins to thrust hard and rhythmically, hovering just above B, occasionally closing for skin on skin contact, chest to chest, which tends to lessen the degree of penetration. It's vanilla sex so far, then they move out of the book.

T ceases to thrust, withdrawing a little, holds it there, runs his lips across B's ears and face, licking his eyes, then strains forward, as if moving his whole body upwards into B. He holds himself there long seconds, then raises himself, sits back, and in one smooth gesture lifts B's legs so his knees hook across T's shoulders. T sits back, head facing the ceiling, and rests his weight on his arms. Neither now can see much of the other. They close their eyes and give way to this form of slow and deep penetration, which lifts B's buttocks on top of T's groin, a confusion of T + B categories. Sound becomes a more privileged sense than sight as regards each man's awareness of the other. Each feels both very privately located within his sensations and fantasies, and also entirely alert to the other.

Time now for the penultimate movement - since chess has by now become music. T sits forward, holds B's ankles, and strongly lifts his, B's, legs, hauling him upwards. The sex is more vigorous now. There may even be snarling on one side, yelps and moans on the other. In theatrical terms, it's Act V. But rather than end with explosion, there is one last twist, and romantic resolution, to follow.

T senses his climax approaching. He stops. He waits. He pulls back from the edge, then lies across B and they hug and hold each other, kiss, and go slowly to the finish. Each shares T's orgasm as a long consummation. The fun, the aggression, the sport, the irony are all played out. It's a wave which swells then breaks as it hits the shore. The sound, no matter how loud, is hardly discernable, because it has been anticipated, longed for, almost heard already, understood by both as absolutely right.

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