A space dedicated to longtime QL blogger, Ulla Kelly.

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The Only Dyke

By Ulla Kelly

Rather a lot of people ask me what it's like being the only gay in the village. Of course, I'm probably not - just the only out gay in it. When my girlfriend visits, the queer population doubles and every walk on the beach feels like a pride march. Anyway, I live in a little coastal village with a shop, a church and a library which opens twice a week to make sure that all the romances and cowboy stories get some oxygen.

There's this global thought process, I think, where queer people apparently need to be in urban areas so that they can find other queer people and go to their parties. To a certain extent, I agree with that - I wouldn't have missed living in Cape Town, London, Johannesburg, Edinburgh etc for the world. Sometimes I miss being able to just relax with my tribe, although these days I prefer restaurants and bars to nightclubs. Then again, I'm not on the pull any more.

The internet makes a big difference too; I hate phones and love the written word, so text-based communication is great and keeps me up to date with the scene in general and my close friends in particular. I should mention here that I live in an area devoid of any form of broadband net access, but hey, us coastal types are slow anyway, right?

My own life seems a little unreal even to me sometimes. I've seen whales from my stoep a lot over the past few months and dolphins when I walk the dogs on the beach. Yesterday I went to work and got distracted photographing a warthog. It's a good sort of a lifestyle if you're something of a hermit (and I am).

Occasionally I see one other lesbian - there used to be a pair in the next village, but I heard on the straightvine that they had a nasty breakup. That makes a whole one incident of dyke drama in the year I've been here.

My social calendar and pockets might be fairly empty down here, but my heart's full and that's not a bad trade.

If anyone needs me, I'll be staring at the sea.

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