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Traumatized At The Gym

Traumatized At The Gym

I have been visually traumatized by some of the things that men have been wearing to the gym lately. So much so that I’ve almost become scarred for life. I understand many people go to the gym for “hook-ups” or for the opportunity to meet that next someone special, but come on!

Come on guys, be a little considerate and DON’T do the following at the gym

Do not wear white basketball shorts with a black thong.
Better yet, just don’t wear thongs to the gym. White, when wet, can be translucent. I get this may be the point, but the gym is not the place for this type of show. To add to my horror, I was confused about whether he was trying to attract me or the 65 year old woman on the cycle behind me.
It is a bad combination to be horrified and confused at the same time.
Please leave the translucent thong showing clothing at home, period.

Do not wear a Speedo
Yes, you read right… I just think Speedos should be against gym law. Really dears.. Who wants to see an unfit and overweight man in a Speedo? Especially if the lunchbox is extremely lacking in sustenance. It takes just one of these at a gym to ruin it for all the body beautifuls as well. So, best to ban speedo’s altogether and go for plain old board shorts. Problem solved!

PS: Its a fact that some men are show-ers and some are growers, but if your wing ding is as big as my pinky when you hit 21 then chances are you aren’t going to grow any bigger than my middle finger.

Do not wear a one-piece leotard with a cup.
Are you thinking this should be a given? I saw a 50 something wearing a one-piece leotard with what looked to be a built in cup. This man had the nerve to do the slow and deliberate walk behind me and I couldn’t help but wonder if he was planning to poke me with his cup. Traumatized I was, seriously.

No leotards are to be worn by men at the gym EVER cup or not. He was not practicing ballet or stretching either, he was working out with weights!

Please cover up unsightly bits
Please don’t have body parts hanging out in every direction. There is a way to dress appropriately so that there is some discretion. You don’t even have to match or even wear workout attire, but please wear clothing that comfortably covers up the areas that are less appealing.

I believe the gym should be visually safe for everyone rather than visually terrifying.
There SHOULD be a gym dress code…
I’m just saying!